Dear Special Ed: Don’t put my kid in a diaper all day, she is a person….


This has been an unusually cold week for us, cold and rainy.  The kids have been in pants and sweaters all week.  Today, I go to pick up my stepdaughter Star from school, like I do every day at 2:30.  She’s 16, has special needs and is non verbal.  She’s also very smart.  Things she loves include, her hair, makeup, her ipad and my oldest son Andrew.  Anyways, I pull up and she’s standing outside by herself with some weird boy shorts on.  There’s no one around to ask why the change of clothes and there’s no note in her backpack.   We get in the car and I see the bag with her dirty pants and underwear in it, she got sick and had an accident.  I want to make this very clear, Star does NOT have accidents unless she is sick.  She uses the bathroom on her own like everyone else and has never had an accident at school.  She does NOT wear diapers either.  She has been in the same class with the same teacher for three years.

We get home and she runs to the bathroom, she is still sick.  I check on her and notice she has a huge diaper on under the weird boy shorts.  Here’s the thing, we have literally gotten a call from the school before telling us that she’s sleepy so we should pick her up.  So she gets sick at school, has an accident, and you can’t think to call me?  You would rather put a huge diaper on her with lord knows whos’ shorts (when it’s under 50 degrees outside), make her walk around like that all day and then just leave her to fend for herself at pick up?

The big kicker is that we have a relationship with this teacher.  She knows how Star is and she knows how particular we are with her, especially her hygiene.  For the most part, I really like her teacher, perhaps she had an off day.  But I’m still simmering in this and will be sending her a nice email explaining that I need a phone call if this ever happens again.  That’s all that I can do for now.